ReelBob: ‘Bad Boys for Life’ ★

By Bob Bloom

Bad boys, bad boys, whatcha gonna do? No more sequels that I have to sit through.

“Bad Boys for Life” is a generic cop thriller that relies on bloody images, bullet-riddled bodies, explosions, chases, and cliched, quick-cut fights to carry it from beginning to end.

The third film in this series is definitely not a charm. Rather, it is a routine entry that relies on the goodwill of its two predecessors to tote it forward.

Will Smith and Martin Lawrence return as Miami detectives Mike Lowry and Marcus Burnett, who, 17 years after the last movie, are older but definitely not wiser.

The movie is your basic revenge story with a hell-hath-no-fury-like-a-woman-scorned subtext.

It opens with an excessively brutal and preposterous prison break and ends with a mind-boggling and ludicrous act of redemption.

In the interminable time between, we get about a dozen reminders that the movie is entitled “Bad Boys for Life,” tiresome and repetitive bantering between Lowry and Burnett — mostly about how they are aging — and enough jaw-dropping WTF moments that will make you believe you were shanghaied, dragged into a DeLorean and transported back to 1995.

Michael Bay, who directed the first two “Bad Boys” films, has turned over those duties to Adil El Arbi and Bilall Fallah, who seem more interested in becoming Bay wannabes than creating their own filmmaking style.

“Bad Boys for Life” is filled with several incredulous moments that will have you shaking your head in disbelief. Early in the film, for example, a major character is shot three times in the chest. Not only does he survive but, six months later, he is back on the street and kicking ass, trading blows with a villain half his age that would land any normal person in traction for another six months.

Every character in the film is a generic “type” — the police captain (the wonderful Joe Pantoliano) who continually rants about the actions of his insubordinate subordinates; the no-nonsense, by-the-book lieutenant (Vanessa Hudgens) who has a “past” with Lowry; and the evil and domineering Isabel Aretas (Kate del Castillo) whose escape triggers the entire fiasco.

Plus, a squad of cliched and young techie-cops use drones, computers and hacking abilities to get the job done. They obnoxiously mock Lowry about his age and old-school tactics.

During the movie, Mexican telenovelas are referenced a few times, and moments in “Bad Boys for Life” play like scenes from one of those melodramatic soap operas.

And one of the film’s plot points seems to be a rip-off variation from Smith’s recent “Gemini Man.” Thus, you have bad building on bad, which equals badder? Worse?

Whatever. Anyway, Smith and Lawrence go through the motions, with Smith’s Lowry, as always, rushing headlong into danger without thinking about the consequences, with Lawrence’s Burnett constantly complaining about his partner’s lack of impulse control, driving and “dumbass” life choices.

Plus, while Smith looks as if he hasn’t aged, Lawrence has jowls that remind you of old-time character actor Sydney Greenstreet.

If stupid and loud movies are your thing, then “Bad Boys for Life” is definitely for you. It is a mind-numbing experience that will leave you gasping and laughing.

Unfortunately, the closing moments leave an opening for a sequel.

My advice: Old men, old men, stop doin’ what you do. No more movies that will make me want to spew.

I am a founding member of the Indiana Film Journalists Association. My reviews appear at ReelBob (reelbob.com) and Rottentomatoes (www.rottentomatoes.com). I also review Blu-rays and DVDs. I can be reached by email at bobbloomjc@gmail.com or on Twitter @ReelBobBloom. Links to my reviews can be found on Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn.

BAD BOYS FOR LIFE
1 star out of 4
(R), graphic violence, bloody images, language, sexual references, drug use