ReelBob: ‘Black Easter’ ★★

By Bob Bloom

“Black Easter” originally was released last summer as “Assassins 33 A.D.”

The basic story is about a billionaire industrialist who is basically a Muslim extremist, who hires a group of young researchers led by Ram Goldstein (Morgan Roberts) to create a matter transporting device.

Instead the scientists accidentally invent a time-travel contraption, which gives the industrialist the idea of sending a hit team to Jerusalem to assassinate Jesus Christ and his disciples.

In my original review, I wrote that some movies are like car wrecks you pass on the highway. Even though you know you shouldn’t, you slow down to gape at the possible carnage.

That basically described my feelings about “Assassin 33 A.D.” It was so bad that it’s amusing to watch. Call it a super, super guilty pleasure.

The original movie played like a project film majors at Oral Roberts University would produce as their senior project.

It sounded as if I disliked the movie. Really, though, it found it amateurishly funny.

But it sucks you in. You are like a deer in the headlights, mesmerized as this oncoming feature barrels towards you, yet you are incapable of moving.

Director Jim Carroll has recut “Assassins 33 A.D.” to make it more acceptable for audiences. He has toned down the anti-Muslim rhetoric, rejiggered some scenes and added voice-over narration by the Goldstein character, making “Black Easter” about four minutes longer than his original concept.

Is it any better than the original version? Not really. I understand Carroll’s desire to attract a wider audience. But in doing so, he has diluted his far-out concept in an attempt to make his movie mainstream.

Carroll should make a statement and embrace the original.

It’s goofy fun watching characters using the time machine as easily and often as the New York City subway.

The film, despite its faith-based foundation, still is nonsensical. It’s a silly stew with echoes of “Groundhog Day” and “The Terminator.”

Even with a new title and in recut, “Black Easter” is prime schlock, in a category with such other silly programmers as 1953’s “Robot Monster” or any grade-Z PRC or Monogram sci-fi effort from the 1940s.

“Black Easter” remains in a class by itself. Some sequences still may make you squirm, but overall, the movie will have you laughing.

I am a founding member of the Indiana Film Journalists Association. My reviews appear at ReelBob (reelbob.com) and Rottentomatoes (www.rottentomatoes.com). I also review Blu-rays and DVDs. I can be reached by email at bobbloomjc@gmail.com or on Twitter @ReelBobBloom. Links to my reviews can be found on Facebook, Twitter and LinkedIn.

BLACK EASTER
2 stars out of 4
(PG-13), graphic violence, thematic elements